Duality of Life
"Therefore being and non-being produce each other;
difficult and easy complete each other;
long and short contrast each other;
high and low distinguish each other;
sound and voice harmonize with each other;
beginning and end follow each other."
(Chapter 2, Dao De Jing - Lao Zi)
Today is 1212 …. Well without realizing, it’s the same numbers as previous entry. Interesting and yet freaky. What’s so special about this number? Well, for the past few weeks I’ve been seeing this number so often on watches, car plates, and my own computer clock. Whenever I turned my head, I saw 1212. It freaked me out. Then I checked with someone, does it have any meaning at all? Then I found out to some people, #12 represents a new beginning – a new start. And today I’m entering “the” new day – Monday to be exact – in quite a bizarre way.
What on earth am I talking about?
Through the start of the day, I felt different. I may be zombied out as I only had 4.5hrs sleep but I don’t think it’s due to that. Today is just so different that at each moment I thought I’m going berserk … lost touch of my feeling … lost touch of my thoughts … lost touch of me … Please don’t ask me why, don’t ask me how. It just happened and I’m not sure why myself.
I was busy at work too but I don’t think that’s the reason either, I don’t know why it just feels different. It’s like … if there are 2 sides of a coin, I’m living both at the same time today. I feel good and yet I feel bad. I am truthful but yet I’m deceitful. I was cranky and yet I am happy. I felt lost but I know for sure I’ve just found myself. Hmm … this reminds me of what Alanis Morissette said in “Ironic” –
Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything’s okay and everything’s going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out
When you think everything’s gone wrong and everything blows up in your face
Again, life … today is presented so well in this long lasting symbol of harmony and complexity. Yin and Yang. Look at the symbol, there’s little bit black in white, and little bit white in black. In Yin, there’s Yang. In Yang, there’s Yin. Life works like that too. When you think everything’s good, there’s little bit of “not-good” in it and when you think something is not-so-good, there’s actually a little bit of goodness in it too. I’m not sure whether I’m making any sense as my eyes can hardly open and yet I’m trying to be sensical. (Ironic, again…) But, somehow today, I can feel 2 sides at once. Like how Joni Mitchell said in her song –
“I’ve looked at life from both sides now
From win and lose, and still somehow
It’s life’s illusions I recall
I really don’t know life at all”
Well, it’s been a really weird day. I don’t know how. I don’t know why and I’ll leave it that way. Guess, it’s really a very Yin-Yang-ish day today till I don’t know whether I’m Yin, Yang, Yin in Yang or Yang in Ying. Life has so many faces. Imagine what will you be if you are able to feel all feelings at the same time? Hmm …..
Okay, I’d better shut up. -_- ….
Om Shanti.
